Author: S.T. Abby
Category: Young Adult
Go to read content：https://readnovelfree.com/p/35451_13
I hate myself. I hate this fucking case. And I hate everything that is standing between me and Lana right now.
“I fucked up,” I say quietly to Hadley as I drop to a chair in her cabin.
“I’ll say,” she mumbles.
“I don’t know what to do right now, but I shouldn’t have done what I did. I didn’t know she was Victoria when…”
I blow out a long breath, letting the words trail off, unable to finish them.
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“When what?” Hadley prompts, leaning up.
“I fucked her out of anger, and then cuffed her to the bed, left her naked and exposed, and didn’t let her speak.”
Hadley goes stiff beside me.
“You didn’t,” she says in a harsh whisper, her teeth grinding.
I clench my hands together, lacing my fingers with each other tight enough to cause pain. “I thought she was Kennedy and obsessed with Victoria Evans. I had no idea she was Victoria Evans. I’d have handled everything differently. I’d be no less confused, but I sure as fuck wouldn’t have done that to her. I thought she’d been playing me. I was hurt. I felt duped. And—”
“And obsessed proxies are unstable and unable to love without fixation,” Hadley points out grimly. “But she’s not an obsessed proxy. She’s a scarred girl with more shit in her life than any one person should ever have to endure. And you just took your turn shitting on her. Great job, Bennett. Great fucking job.”
She stands, and I curse while standing with her. “I realize I fucked up. I’m trying to fix it, Hadley. But I can’t find her. That’s why I’m here.”
“Define your version of fixing it,” she says, eyeing me suspiciously.
“I have no idea just yet. It’s not like I can simply condone all she’s doing. And it’s not like I can lie and say I don’t understand it either. I feel…fucked up,” I groan, putting my head in my hands.
She leans up, her eyes on mine. “I realize I’m not the Boy Scout you are, but—”
“Don’t do that, Hadley,” I interrupt, my jaw ticking. “Don’t act like being conflicted about torture and murder means I have a stick up my ass.”
She collapses back against the chair, releasing a tortured breath.
“My stepfather was a monster, and my mother and her shrink convinced me I was a pathological liar for seeing him as such.” Her random, yet pained comment has me tensing. “Seventy kids in total that we know about, Logan.”
Her eyes tear up, and she clears her throat.
“I was conflicted too. Then I realized there were only sixty-nine pictures.”
“Your picture was missing,” I say quietly, but I already knew this. I just didn’t piece together at the time that it was my girlfriend sparing Hadley the indignity of the others seeing it.
“She didn
’t want me to see the vulnerable little girl I was because she was afraid it would break me. Lana has lived through more pain than most people can endure. The physical pain alone from the numerous surgeries she needed to rebuild her facial structure was bad enough. Imagine the psychological toll that took on her. She lost her family. She lost her home. She gave up her identity so that it couldn’t be taken away. She’s stronger than you’re giving her credit for, and yeah. Maybe I’m a sick motherfucker, but I’m on her side.”
I scrub my face with both hands, staring at nothing as I try to process everything around me.
“It took me a minute to wrap my head around it, which is why I’m not punching you for doing the same. It’s also why I let you in here after you said you were done with me,” she adds.
Her lips quirk, and I run my hand over the stubble on my jaw, thinking about the way Lana would do that to me when she first woke up. She constantly touched me, as if checking to make sure I was still real.
“You were everything to her,” Hadley says quietly. “I’ve never been loved like that. She saved your life, Logan. This town tried to kill you, and she saved you. Personally, I think it’s over-the-top to stab a guy for the man you love, but still perfectly affective.”
Usually I appreciate her dry humor. Not so much today.
She rolls her eyes when I don’t crack a smile. “You need to pick a side soon, Logan. You can’t hang out in limbo. I chose mine, and it’s her.”
“So you’ve been falsifying all your forensic reports on—”