Author: Andrew Mackay
Category: Humorous
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"Unbelievable," Tor sat into his chair and looked at Androgyne, "Uh, what will happen to him now?"
"He’ll spend the next eighteen months in N-Carcerate, twelve of them in hyper-sleep. When we get back, USARIC will try him on the evidence. Pretty compelling stuff. I wouldn’t be surprised if they execute him."
"Wow," Tor shook his head once again, "Did he say why he did it?"
"No."
"Did you upset him?"
"No."
"Why do you think he did it?"
"I don’t know."
"Did he say why he did it?"
"What do you think, Tor? I don’t know." Katz let out a violent exasperation, "Yeah, the second I asked nicely, he was all like "Oh, Daryl, I really love you, but you’re married, and if I can’t have you, no one can!" Idiot."
"I’m sorry, Daryl," Tor cleared his throat. He hadn’t seen this Katz’s wrath of venom before now, "I didn’t mean to—"
"—No, you didn’t meant to, whatever that means. No one ever means to," Katz took a deep breath and felt sorry for his first comms officer. He was only trying to help, after all, "I’m sorry, Tor. I shouldn’t take it out on you. I’m a bit on edge."
"Captain Katz?" Androgyne stood in her outer-suit, prepared for action. The helmet sat around her shoulders with the visor opened, "Should I proceed to the primary airlock?"
Katz took a deep breath and tried to acclimatize himself to his work environment, "Yes. Good idea. I’ll have Bonnie accompany you to disembarkation."
"Thank you, Captain."
Androgyne turned around and made her way out of the control deck.
"Oh, and… Androgyne?"
"Yes, captain?"
"Watch your six," Katz returned to the control deck, "You never know where danger is going to spring from."
CHAPTER TWELVE
Primary Airlock
Space Opera Beta - Level One
Androgyne and Bonnie reached the primary airlock. The latter pressed her finger to her ear, "Okay, we’re all set."
"Understood," Katz voice came through her headset, "When Androgyne reaches Alpha’s dock all she has to do is press her glove to the outer plate and it should open. Standby for bridge connection."
Bonnie patted down Androgyne’s outer-skin; a thin, silver spacesuit that clung to her skin like a pair of leggings. Androgyne’s helmet was more traditional - resembling a small goldfish bowl.
"You ready?"
"I’m scared, Dr. Whitaker."
"Don’t be. We’re right behind you. Check your comms," Bonnie nodded at her ear, "Say something."
Androgyne flipped down her visor. It locked to the rim of the helmet. An ear piece automatically folded around her mouth, "Can you hear me?"
Bonnie turned away to make sure she could hear her voice, "Loud and clear. You read me?"
"Yes," Androgyne looked around inside her helmet, "You’re coming through crystal clear."
The ship began to rumble.
Bonnie looked through the first door to the airlock. Through the second window, the pair could see the bridge extend away from the ship and head for the airlock on Space Opera Alpha.
"We don’t know what you’ll find in there."
"Bonnie," Katz interrupted through the headset, "Don’t intimidate the poor girl. Androgyne, can you read me?"
"Yes, Captain."
Androgyne took in the enormity of what was about to happen, "When you board Alpha, we need to establish three things. One, that the ship is habitable for human life. Two, that Alpha’s on board Manuel is operational. He’s an older generation, so if he’s operational, you should expect some differences to our own."
"Yes, Captain."
"Three, we need to know who survived. It’s that simple."
"Understood, Captain."
"Once we’ve established those three facts we’ll join you and see what we can salvage and rescue."
"I understand," she stared through the airlock window and feared for her life.
"There’s nothing to be worried about, Androgyne," Katz said. "I want you to provide a running commentary at all times. If there’s a period of more than ten seconds of radio silence, we’ll assume something is wrong and act accordingly. You’re in safe hands."
The primary airlock door slid to the side and offered Androgyne into the compression chamber.
"The bridge is ready," Katz said. "Prepare to disembark."
Bonnie held Androgyne’s shoulder and reassured her, "Good luck. Remember, keep in constant contact."
"Yes."
Androgyne took a deep breath and stepped into the airlock. The door slid behind her as she stood perfectly still, "I’m ready, Captain."
"Good."
Bonnie waved at her as the outer door opened onto the white, ceramic bridge that presented a thirty second walk to Space Opera Alpha’s airlock, "Good luck."
"Thanks, Bonnie."
Androgyne stepped onto the bridge and took her first few weightless steps. She held the bridge railing for dear life.
She took in the view of Saturn and her rings looming above her head, spinning very, very slowly, "Wow."
"What’s up, Androgyne?" Katz asked.
"It’s amazient. It’s so big."
"Try not to look up, keep focused," Bonnie’s voice beamed around her head, "Admiring the view will only slow you down."
Androgyne twisted her head to the left. Enceladus shone brightly, illuminating her visor. She felt a hum rattle through her outer skin and numb her limbs.
Her feet lifted away from the bridge floor as she moved forward. She grabbed the railing and yanked herself toward the spaceship, her toes barely trailing along the surface.
"Another fifteen seconds, and I’ll be there."
"Keep on the bridge. Don’t let go," Katz advised. "That’s what the rails are for. Use them."
Androgyne reached the edge of the bridge and pressed her palms against Alpha’s airlock door. She scanned the ridges for the plate that would open it.
"I’m here."
"The plate should be shoulder-high to you on the right of Alpha’s airlock," Bonnie said.
"Understood."
The plate was exactly where Bonnie said it would be. Androgyne slapped her palm against the surface, "Opening now."
"Understood. You might want to take a step back so the bridge can connect."
She did as instructed.
Alpha’s airlock door flew up and released a burst of pressurized air. The edge of the bridge snapped to the metal rim, locking into place.
"Get in," Katz said.
"Yes."
She yanked herself forward and floated into the airlock, looking down at the bridge completing its connection. Opera Alpha and Opera Beta joined together by the bridge.
"Releasing thrusters, now," Katz advised. "Confirm connection, please, Androgyne."
"Connection confirmed," She slammed a red button on the wall of the airlock with her fist, "Closing outer airlock hatch, now."
The room whirred, preparing to shut the door.
"Understood," Katz said.
The door slid down and closed off the exit as Androgyne looked around. An alarm sounded off, followed by a flashing red light.
"What’s that?" she blurted, thinking she was about to die.
"It’s just the airlock hatch closing. Nothing to be scared about."
"Okay."
The door slid down its housing, locking her into place, "I think I’m decompressing."
"Standby. The inner airlock door will open in a few seconds."
Katz stood up from his flight deck console and angled his screen to the control deck.
Tor looked over at the screen and held his headset in place, "Visual?"
"Yep, this is what she’s seeing," Katz pointed at his screen.
It offered a live feed from Androgyne’s visor. The pair watched as she moved through the inner airlock door and into the ship.
"Androgyne, we have POV visual. We can see what you can see."
Katz folded his arms and watched the monitor, "Give Manuel a command."
"What should I tell him?"
"Maybe turn the lights on?"
The screen went pitch black as Androgyne stepped into the darkness and looked around, "On-board computer, Manuel. Do you read me?"
No response.
"Manuel?" Androgyne was close to giving up, "Nothing is happening.”
"The live feed is a bit patchy, can you see anything?" Katz asked and turned to Tor for a reaction, "Alpha’s power must be down."
Tor didn’t know how to respond, "It could have gone into stasis. Knock it out of sleep mode."
"Androgyne," Katz said. "Try the following command. A-W-A-K-E-4-5-7."
"Affirmative. A-W-A-K-E-4-5-7."
The moment she finished repeating the command, the lights flickered. The interior of Space Opera Alpha sprang to life.
It felt like she was breathing once again.
She was faced with a dusty, corridor leading to the control center, "Should I unmask, now?"
"Yes, take an atmosphere reading," Katz bit his lip in the hope that the exposure wouldn’t fry her circuits, "Report on atmosphere levels, please."
Androgyne closed her eyes and flicked a switch on her visor. The front panel lifted up.
She was convinced she’d suffocate. Once her lungs filled with oxygen her mind was put at rest.
"I can breathe," she took out a thin black panel out of her pocket, "Taking a reading now."
Classical music played in the distance. A familiar tune to anyone who could hear it.
The panel beamed to life. Its numbers spun around as she waved it around. The result appeared on the screen: 81mm Hg.
"Did you get the reading?"
"Yes, just patching it through now," Katz looked at the number appear in the top-right of the screen. "Eighty-one milligrams? Seems perfectly reasonable. Botanix must still be in operation."
"Manuel?" Androgyne asked. "Can anyone read me?"
"Still nothing?" Katz asked.
"No. I’m making my way to the control deck," she said, walking toward the door.
Several clanging noises waded through the ship’s vibration as she made her way to the door, "Centrifuge is normal."
"Understood. So it’s just Manuel we’re having issues with?"
"It seems so."
Androgyne reached the door to the control desk and hit the button on the wall.
It slid open to reveal an exact replica of Space Opera Beta’s deck.
A front panel with exactly the same ship controls - and an empty chair. To her left, the comms panel, and an empty chair. Beethoven’s 5th Symphony in C Minor played from the communications panel.
"Can you hear the music?"
"Yes," Katz voice came through the headset.
"Captain? Can you see what I’m seeing?"
"Yes. How’s the flight deck. Is it operational?"
"The controls are on but there’s nobody here."
Back on Opera Beta, Manuel appeared beside Katz’s face and flapped its pages, "Captain, may I suggest something?"
"Yes, Manuel?"
"Perhaps if I board the vessel I can infiltrate the main unit and start investigating?"
"Let’s wait a moment and see what we find," Katz returned to the live feed, "Androgyne? Can you read me?"
"Yes, Captain."
"Atmosphere levels confirmed, but no sign of life."
"That is correct."
Tor placed his hand on the screen, "Androgyne, this is Tor. Can you patch into Alpha’s mainframe on the comms panel, please?"
Katz looked at him, quizzically, "What are you doing?"
"I want to know the status of communication. I think you’d want to know too, right?"
"Sure, go ahead."
Tor raced over to the comms panel, sat into his chair and began typing.
Androgyne did the same on Opera Alpha, "Okay, I’m here."
"Try this. I’m sending you the coordinates," Tor said. "If Alpha is operational it should respond to the following code."
"Okay."
"USARIC, hyphen, S, O, A, hyphen, one, one, eight.."
"Understood," Androgyne typed the command into the comms deck, "Done."
"We’re looking for captain Zillah Chin-Dunne," Tor said. "OSR. One, One Eight."
Androgyne typed O-S-R-1-1-8 onto the keyboard, "Okay, done."
The mainframe beeped and sprung to life. The screen displayed a colossal amount of static which took Androgyne by surprise, "What’s happening?"
A voice from behind her, "What are you doing?"
Androgyne spun around on her chair and gulped back the urge to scream. She froze solid and stared at the vision in front of her.
"Z-Zillah?"
"My God," Katz looked at the screen with bewilderment, "Tor, look at this."
"What?"
Tor joined Katz to observe the woman in Androgyne’s POV feed, "Is that her?"
Katz interrupted him, "Androgyne?"
Zillah Chin-Dunne, the Japanese captain of Space Opera Alpha, stood a few feet away from Androgyne. Apart from her unhappy demeanor she seemed to be a picture of health.
Zillah shut the music off, catching Androgyne’s attention, "What are you doing here?"
"I, uh, don’t know what to say—"
"—I put you back in N-Vigorate for your own safety. How did you get out?"
Zillah made her way to the communications panel and shut it down. Androgyne couldn’t help but stare at her, utterly confused.
"Androgyne," Katz whispered, "This is Zillah, the captain of Opera Alpha. Judging by the way she’s talking, she thinks you’re Alpha’s Androgyne unit. Just play along with it."
"Honestly," Zillah flicked the levers off one-by-one on the communications unit, "What are you doing here? Why are you fiddling around with things that don’t involve you?"
"She thinks I’m a droid?" Androgyne whispered a bit too loud.
"No, don’t say—" Katz’s voice cut off.
"Huh?" Zillah shot Androgyne a look of suspicion. "Who are you talking to?"
"Umm, no-one. Captain."
"Who woke you?" Zillah planted her hands on Androgyne’s shoulders and inspected her face, "You can’t wake yourself up, so someone must have done it. Who was it?"
"I, uh, do not know how to respond."
"Oh…" Zillah finally put two and two together, "You’re not my Androgyne, are you?"
"Yes, I am," she said, afraid to reveal the truth.
"What lessense," Zillah pushed her away, "Manuel?"
The Alpha’s Manuel appeared beside Zillah and hovered around her, "Yes, Captain?"
"Who is this impostor?"
The holographic book fluttered over to Androgyne and inspected her, "She’s not one of ours, Captain. She’s from the ship that has just connected to us."
Zillah couldn’t believe what she was hearing, "What ship?"
"I’m getting a reading that another ship has docked with us."
Androgyne held her breath, waiting for Zillah’s response. Hopefully it would be one in which she didn’t end up killing her.
"We’ve been rescued?" A smile crept along Zillah’s face, "The rescue vessel responded? They got our message?"
Manuel floated back to her, "It seems so, Captain.”
"Oh, goodie!" Zillah danced a happy dance and clapped her hands together, "My God, I thought we were doomed."
"I, uh," Androgyne stepped out of the chair and ran an array of excuses through her mind, "I’m not sure—"
"—USARIC got our message and have come to save us!" Overjoyed, Zillah became very emotional. She held out her hand for Androgyne to shake, "Thank you so much for coming. Can I speak to your Captain, please?"
"Umm, yes. Okay," she said. "Captain Katz?"
"Yes?"
"Captain Chin-Dunne would like to speak to you."
A few moments lat
er, Zillah patched her headset into Androgyne’s frequency and led her into the hyper-sleep chamber.
"How has the crew been able to sustain themselves for the past four years?" Katz asked Zillah.
"When Opera Alpha arrived at Enceladus, she blacked-out entirely. All comms went down for approximately twenty minutes. When the backup drive started and comms became operational I sent out a distress call."
Zillah pointed at the six hyper-sleep pods.
"Botanix took a hit. Fifty-eight percent damage," she said. "A lot of the plant life didn’t survive and the main coolant stopped producing water. My only option was to conserve oxygen and food, and put the crew and myself in hyper-sleep."
Katz, much like Androgyne, felt that something was truly off.
"Are they being fed intravenously?" Katz asked.
"Yes, we have enough protein and supplements to last ten years," Zillah explained. "But only enough oxygen for seventy-two hours. We genuinely didn’t think we would see rescue."
"What’s the situation with Alpha’s thrusters?" Katz asked.
"Heavy damage. We were a sitting duck out there praying for rescue. It doesn’t matter, now, if we can board Beta and go home with you."
"We don’t have enough hyper-sleep chambers to house everyone," Katz said. "I’d like to send my team in to investigate. It’s possible we could return to Earth together and have each crew member spend half the journey in stasis."
"Everyone would spend six months awake?"
"Yes, something like that," Katz turned to Tor and muted his audio connection to Alpha, "I don’t like this one bit. I want to know what happened to them. Why did they black out?"
"Understood, Captain."
"Assemble our crew. We’re boarding Alpha," Katz returned to the screen and opened the audio connection, "Zillah, can you confirm Alpha is ready to accommodate my team?"
"Yes, Captain," Zillah said. "I can show you what you need to see when you board."
"Thanks, I’ll leave our Androgyne with you. My team and I will board Alpha in thirty minutes. There will be five of us boarding, including our feline."
Zillah entered Alpha’s control deck and looked at Androgyne with suspicion, "USARIC sent a feline up with you?"