Author: Andrew Mackay
Category: Humorous
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“North American pig,” Baldron smirked and spat in Bonnie’s direction, “Just a failed Androgyne Series Three upgrade. Like all the others.”
"It is true, I’m afraid," Tor chuckled. "Just an obedient, useless heap of failed Manning/Synapse ideas. That’s all you are. Poetic, really. A waste of space."
"What happened to Androgyne?" Bonnie spluttered and wiped her lip, wanting blood. "What did you do to her?"
"We didn’t do anything to her," Tor said. "She did it to herself."
"No," Bonnie shook her head as entire life flashed before her eyes, "I remember everything. You’re lying."
"I assure you I am not. And I assure you, you don’t remember a thing. Do you?"
Bonnie let out an ear-piercing scream, "I am not an android."
"Ha. I love how you refuse to accept facts that are staring you dead in the face," Tor nodded at the door, "Speaking of dead, where are Jaycee and Haloo?"
"We sent them to Botanix," Tripp lied and briefly caught Bonnie’s gaze, "We needed to make sure it was operational before we committed to any revisions on how to proceed."
"Good, let’s go."
Tripp and Bonnie led the way with their hands above their heads. Tor and Baldron kept their weapons aimed at them from behind.
***
Wool opened her eyes. She didn’t recognize where she was at first.
The silver walls gave her a clue.
The padded bench seemed familiar.
"Where am I?" she rubbed her eyes and looked down at her foot. Her ankle had a metal shackle attached to it, "What?"
She wiggled her foot which caused the metal chain to clang against the floor. She looked up and saw the electric bars.
"What am I doing in N-Carcerate?" She stood up from the bench and made for the bars. The shackle kept her from reaching them.
Then, she remembered just how painful it would be if she touched them. The shimmer on the glowing bars threatened to zap anyone stupid enough to have a go.
She patted the side of her pants and reached into her pocket in haste. Once she found that her belongings had been removed, she panicked.
"Help, help," She shouted at the ceiling at the top of her lungs, "Someone, please. Help me. Can anyone hear me?"
Jaycee hooked Haloo up to a diagnostic module in Medix. She hadn’t held up very well at all - half-conscious, her face had blossomed bright pink. Her eyes had stopped bleeding for the time being.
"You have a fever, Haloo," Jaycee kept an eye on the monitor, "Your body temperature is well over one hundred."
Jelly paced around, shifting her opposable metal thumbs against the floor.
Something was agitating her.
Jelly leaned back on her haunches hopped onto Haloo’s bed. She flapped her tail around and trundled over to the woman’s face.
"Meow," Jelly sniffed around Haloo’s face.
"Jelly, sweetie…" She half-croaked, "What are you doing?"
The cat pressed her paws on Haloo’s shoulder and leaned in for a good, deep sniff. The tip of her nose met with Haloo’s.
"I’m sick, Jelly," Haloo muttered. "Stay away from m-me."
"Huh…" Jelly huffed into her face as her whiskers tingled, "Huuuh… Loo…"
Haloo and Jaycee turned to Jelly in incredulity.
"Ha-loo…"
"Huh?" Jaycee tilted his head at the cat, "Say that again, girl?"
"Ha-loo…" Jelly’s voice creaked as she tried to speak. "Ha… Loo…"
"My God," Haloo cleared her throat and lifted her hand up to Jelly’s head, "She said my name…"
Haloo’s chest bounced into the air unexpectedly, forcing Jelly off the bed. Jaycee stepped back and allowed Haloo to endure her spasm.
The back of her head slapped against the padded bed, pushing more pink blood from her eyes.
Finally, her mouth yawned open and spat out a low-pitched whine, "I-It’s so fantastic…"
"—What is, Haloo? What’s fantastic?" Jaycee grabbed her shoulders and bunched the fabric of her shirt in his palms, "What are you talking about?"
"Can’t you see it?" She gasped, her chest deflating. The diagnostic machine ran wild. Her heart-rate and temperature rocketed skyward.
"No," Jaycee said, angered by his own helplessness, "What are you talking about?"
"Unngghhh…" Haloo’s chest heaved once more.
Then, she flat-lined.
The dials spun down to zero. Haloo died in Jaycee’s arms right there and then, her eyes looking right into his.
"No, no," Jaycee gasped, "Don’t you dare die on me."
The machine let out a long beep indicating that Haloo had passed away.
Jelly rubbed her face over Jaycee’s foot. He shooed her aside and made for the defibrillator that hung on the side of the machine, "Sorry, girl. Stand back."
He tore Haloo’s outer-skin suit open at the chest.
"Wuuuhhh," Jelly groaned and shook her head, as if coughing up a fur ball, "Whelp."
Jayce powered up the defibrillator paddles in both hands. They whined to life and buzzed, "Clear."
He jolted Haloo with the paddles, trying to shock her to life. Each time he did, Jelly backed up, groaning in pain.
Jaycee gave up and hooked the paddles on the machine. Haloo was well and truly gone. He knew it, and so did Jelly.
He let out an almighty roar of anger, startling the feline by his feet. He thumped the bed, which rocked Haloo’s body back and forth.
After taking a deep breath he turned to Jelly. She looked up at him hoping he wouldn’t take his anger out on her.
"Meowgh," she tried but ended up coughing out a rope of pink saliva.
Jaycee reached into his belt and pulled out his secondary Rez-9 firearm. He threw Jelly a look of steely determination, "Someone has to pay for this, right?"
Jelly continued to stare at him and seemed to nod in agreement, "Meow."
Jaycee made for the door and held his finger to his ear, "This is Jaycee Nayall. Can anyone read me?"
No response.
A "meow’ came through his ear piece. The whiskers on Jelly’s face buzzed. She could communicate with him.
"Not you, girl," Jaycee opened the door and lifted his weapon into the crook of his arm, "I repeat, can…"
"… can anyone read me?" Jaycee’s voice finished through Tripp’s headset as he walked along the concourse with his hands behind his head.
Bonnie could hear him, too.
Tor and Baldron chuckled to each other, having heard the request for contact, "Do not respond to him."
"No, wait," Baldron whispered to Tor. "Have Tripp advise him to meet them at N-Carcerate. We can execute all of them there."
"Good thinking," Tor buried the barrel of his gun between Tripp’s shoulder blades, "Get him to meet you and Bonnie at N-Carcerate. Don’t tell him what’s happened."
"Okay, okay," Tripp said.
"If you tell him we’re here, we’ll shoot you right here where you stand."
"Fine," Tripp pressed his finger to his ear, "Jaycee, this is Tripp reading you, over."
"Tripp?"
"Yes, Jaycee?"
"Haloo’s dead, man," he said, barely able to contain his anger, "Did you find Tor, yet? We need answers."
"Dead? What do you mean dead?" Tripp asked, hoping he’d misheard Jaycee’s update.
Jaycee’s cleared his throat, "Whatever this virus is… it killed her."
"Virus?" Tor whispered, "What is he talking about?"
Tripp chewed back the urge to emote upon hearing the news of his colleague’s death. "Jaycee, listen. Bonnie and I are en route to N-Carcerate. Can you meet us there now?"
"Yes, I’m on my way."
"Is Jelly with you, too?"
"Yes, she’s with me."
"Good."
"Just as well we’re convening at N-Carcerate," Jaycee half-joked, his thoughts steeped in venom, "I’d quite like to pick Landaker’s brains—"
"—Okay, ETA three minutes—"
"—with
a large screwdriver, then crack open whatever is left of his skull open and drain the contents—"
Tripp let go of his ear and turned over his shoulder to Tor, "He doesn’t sound happy."
"That wasn’t very nice," Baldron booted Bonnie in the small of her back and sent her tumbling down the corridor, "How would he like it if I said nasty things about him behind his back?"
"Silence," Tor said. "It’ll all be over in a few minutes anyway. Keep walking."
Wool felt a rumbling in the N-Carcerate chamber. It wasn’t the footsteps of her visitors, however. Something grander was happening.
A series of vibrations she’d never felt before now.
She looked to her window to find it vibrating, the light from Saturn pouring through into her cell.
"What on Earth…" Her face fell when she saw what was happening to the large planet.
The wreckage from Alpha appeared to be drifting toward it. The rings around the planet slowly split out into three, separate entities. Each of them began to revolve around the planet and throw pieces of the ship away.
"My God, it’s fantastic," Wool whispered to herself.
CLANG.
Wool yelped and turned around to see the main door to N-Carcerate slid open, "Who’s there?"
Tripp and Bonnie walked in, alone. Wool instantly spotted their strange behavior.
"Oh, thank God," Wool cried for joy, "You made it."
"Yes, we did," Tripp said, slowly. "Listen, Wool—"
"—Where are the others?"
"—No time for that right now," Bonnie said. "We are not alone."
"Look, you gotta watch out for Tor. He’s a traitor," Wool shook her ankle, "Can you release me, please?"
Tor and Baldron Kept hidden behind the door to N-Carcerate, eavesdropping on the information they were sure Wool would spill.
"I knew it," Tor cocked his firearm, "She’s told them about us."
"Why are we listening-in?" Baldron sniffed and wiped his eye, "Let’s stop toying with them and kill them, already."
Tor squinted at Baldron’s brow.
"What is it?"
"Your eyes are bleeding," Tor said. "Are you wearing contacts?"
"No, I’m twenty-twenty, I don’t wear contacts," Baldron said, taken aback by the blob of pink blood on his finger, "My face feels really warm."
"Ugh, keep your distance," Tor said. "I don’t want to catch space flu."
"I have not got space flu!" Baldron protested and nudged Tor aside, "Enough. Let’s execute these infidels and get on with our mission."
"Right. Everyone on your knees. Now," Baldron aimed his firearm at Tripp and Bonnie.
"Wait!" Tripp said and bought some time, "Have you seen Saturn, lately?"
"No, and I don’t care."
"Something is happening, look," Tripp nodded at the large window to his left.
Baldron and Tor looked to their right at the window. Their jaws dropped in wonder, "Oh, wow…"
Saturn’s rings were in full gyration. The planet seemed to bulge like a beating heart as the rings revolved around at speed. The inertia coming from the spectacle rocked Opera Beta.
"When we boarded Alpha we were told something was going to happen," Tripp explained.
"The mission isn’t over," Bonnie added. "It’s only just begun."
"What is that?" Tor pointed at Saturn and grew anxious, "Why are the rings doing that?"
"I don’t know," Tripp did his best to make his assailants change their minds about executing them, "But we need to stick around to find out."
"Correction, American," Tor snapped. "We, my comrade and I, need to stick around to find out. Not you."
Bonnie spotted something coming from the corridor. She clenched her fists behind her head and slowly rose to her feet, "Are you going to sabotage what could be the greatest discovery of the universe?"
"Yes," Tor said without a hint of remorse. He swung his gun at her face. "I am going to blast your pretty little head off."
"It’s ironic you said that," Bonnie smirked, evilly.
Tor didn’t get the joke. "How is what I just said ironic—"
BLAM.
A bullet rocketed past his head from behind, scraping a few strands of his hair from the side of his face. Tor jumped forward and slid across the floor, releasing his weapon.
Tripp wasted no time in collecting the gun and pointing it at Tor.
Jaycee stormed forward and pointed his Rez-9 gun at Baldron, who reached into his inner-suit and pulled out a red dumb bomb.
"No, no, no," Baldron threatened to yank the pin away from the bomb. He sidestepped toward the exit to the chamber, "You want us all to die?"
"No," Jaycee fumed, ready to kill the man, "Just you."
"What was that you said to me, Jaycee? Never point your gun at the people you work with?"
"You don’t work with us."
"Hypocrite." Baldron tugged on the pin and threatened to release it.
"Jesus," Tripp kept his Rez-9 pointed at Tor’s head, "Jaycee, don’t exacerbate the situation. Stand down."
Jaycee lowered the gun, angry with himself, "Fine."
"You like surrendering, don’t you, American? Your history is full of failed war stories," Baldron chuckled to himself. "Tor, are you coming?"
"I would," he said, looking at the barrel of his own gun pointing at him from Tripp’s hand, "But, uh, he’s got my gun."
"Give my comrade his weapon back, Mr Healy," Baldron tugged at the pin on the dumb bomb, "If I pull the pin, there’s no going back. We all get a first row view of whatever is happening out there."
"You wouldn’t blow us up," Tripp threw the gun at Tor, who caught it clumsily in his hands, "There’s too much at stake."
"On the contrary, American scum," Baldron wrenched the pin away from the grenade, setting off its sixty second timer. "I just did."
"Oh, God," everyone screamed, "No!"
"Tor, run!" Baldron darted out of the chamber. Tor jumped after him.
"No, wait," Jaycee turned around and chased after them. Tripp fired two rounds in their direction and missed.
Tor and Baldron jumped through the door and closed it shut.
"Goodbye, scumbags," Baldron tossed the dumb bomb through the gap in the door and slammed it shut.
The grenade bounced off Jaycee’s shoulder and rolled across the ground.
Tripp, Bonnie, and Wool stepped back as the digital readout counted down from forty seconds…
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Bonnie pushed herself to the floor in a frantic scramble to grab the dumb bomb as it rolled toward the cells.
She grabbed the device in her hand and yelled, "Thirty-five seconds! What do we do?"
"We can’t shut it off," Wool cried out loud and closed her eyes.
"Stand back," Jaycee aimed his Rez-9 at the door, "Keep your heads down."
BLAMMM!
He blasted the door off its hinges and triggered Opera Beta’s internal alarm. He booted the remains of the door away, "Everyone out."
"I’m stuck," Wool lifted her shackled ankle, "They have the key. I can’t move."
"Wool," Bonnie looked at the timer on the grenade, "Thirty seconds…"
Tor and Baldron ran along the gantry at speed, heading toward Botanix.
"What did you do that for?" Tor asked. "The bomb will blow a hole in the side of the ship.”
"No," Baldron ran ahead of Tor, "N-Carcerate will contain the explosion. We did it. We won. A mass Stateside suicide pact."
The pair’s footsteps clanged along the corridor ground. They felt their feet get lighter. Eventually, their toes drifted away from the floor.
The gravity subsided, sending them into a free-float in the middle of the corridor.
"What’s happening?"
"Someone’s hit the gravity switch," Baldron gasped, and looked at Botanix.
The door slid open. Jelly kicked her hind legs against the frame and propelled forward, claws outstretched.
"Toooorrrr…" she shrieked, f
lying towards him.
"Anderson?" Tor screamed and covered his face, "What are you doing?"
Jelly swiped his face with her metal claws. His skin tore apart in three sections down the side of his face.
"Gaah!"
Tor kicked Jelly away, sending her tumbling through the gravity-less air. He swung his gun in her direction and squeezed the trigger.
"You dumb rodent."
Bang.
The bullet exploded in the chamber. Tor expected it to fly out of the barrel, but in zero gravity, he’d managed to blow his hand apart in a haze of fire and shrapnel.
Tor screamed and held his charred hand in the air, "Kill that damn cat."
Baldron pressed his back against the wall and kicked his feet to the ceiling. He looked back to N-Carcerate to see that door was open. "Oh no."
Bonnie floated into the air with the grenade in her hand, "What do we do?"
"If it goes off here, we’re dead. Sucked out into space if the detonator doesn’t kill us first."
Jaycee released his Rez-9. Instead of hitting the ground, it simply floated away from his palm, "Gimme the bomb."
"What are you going to do?" Tripp pushed himself into Wool’s cell and grabbed her shoulders.
"Something I should have done the instant I met them."
Bonnie pinged the grenade toward Jaycee.
"If I throw it hard enough, Botanix might contain the blast," He caught the grenade and pulled his arm back, "Duck."
Tripp hugged Wool, who clung to him for dear life, "What the— no!"
Jaycee hurled the grenade down the corridor with all his might.
The bomb bolted down the central passage, headed for Tor and Baldron - and Jelly.
Jelly instincts kicked in. She pushed her hind legs off the ground and bolted behind the grenade.
Her claws latched onto the flying bomb and carried her toward Botanix’s open door.
She pressed her knees to her stomach and planted the soles of her hind feet on the dumb bomb.
"What’s she doing?" Tor held his breath and grabbed onto Baldron’s arms.
"I don’t know."
Jelly pushed the dumb bomb forward with her hind paws, pushing it faster along the weightless corridor.