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Author: Andrew Mackay

Category: Humorous

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  Tripp, Haloo, Bonnie, and Jelly stepped aside and allowed Jaycee to blow the inner airlock hatch.

  Tripp flipped his visor down and scanned the cuticle, "Tor, this is Tripp, come in?"

  No response.

  "Okay, blow the airlock," Tripp said.

  Jaycee flipped the lever down on the side of his machine gun. The mechanism whirred to life, heating in his hand. He took aim at the panel.

  "Here we go."

  He blasted the panel, obliterating the inner door. The impact set off the ship’s alarm.

  Jaycee marched in and kicked the rest of the broken door apart with his Titanium boot.

  "Everyone get in," he grabbed the outer airlock hatch lever, "Listen, once this door is open, all hell is gonna break loose. Watch out for debris. Everything inside this ship is going to puke out into space, and we’re standing right in the middle of its throat."

  Katz pushed Jaycee to the side, dumbfounded by the view offered by the glass panel in the door, "My God…"

  "What?" Tripp asked Katz, "What’s wrong?"

  Katz blinked and saw that the bridge was missing. The outer door on Beta’s airlock was open, a mere fifty meters away.

  "The bridge," Katz said, "It’s gone."

  Haloo freaked out and hyperventilated. The inside of her visor fogged up as she grabbed at the handle bar within the airlock, "No, no…"

  Bonnie kept her grip on Jelly, "Haloo, get up."

  "I c-can’t breathe," Haloo puked pink blood up inside her visor, "Grrh-helpsch… m-me…"

  Jaycee hoisted her up to her feet by her arm. She fell into his arms.

  "Katz, we need to go—"

  A colossal explosion rumbled the airlock.

  "What was that?" Katz asked.

  The entire ship rumbled violently, shaking everyone around.

  "No time to wait around to find out," Tripp grabbed the manual handle on the outer airlock door. "Sounded like an explosion."

  Bonnie nodded at the door and held Jelly out. "Open it. We’ll have to jump."

  Tripp took a final glance at Katz and grabbed the handle. "Ready?"

  "Do it."

  Alpha’s alarms sounded off. The spinning red bulbs rotated around and around. "Explosion on Alpha control deck."

  "Androgyne?" Katz said. "On the control deck?"

  "Opening now. Get ready and hold on," Tripp yanked the outer airlock door open.

  Everyone grabbed hold of the bars within the airlock.

  An intense vacuum sucked anything that wasn’t bolted to the ground through the crack in the door as it opened.

  Jelly shrieked and extended her metal claws. "Meaa….oowwarrr…"

  Boom. The airlock door fully opened, lifting everyone off their feet.

  Various objects whizzed past the crew and shot out into the depths of space.

  "Bonnie. Release Jelly first," Tripp clung to the door, "Throw her to Beta."

  "Okay," Bonnie launched Jelly at Beta’s inner airlock hatch.

  The cat screamed and held out her arms, pushing through the infinite vacuum, headed for Beta’s airlock.

  "Meaaooo—" she gulped down, feeling her chest begin to expand. Tufts of fur flew away from her face and littered the inside of her visor.

  She clenched her claws and grabbed onto the inner airlock hatch, completing the journey in a matter of seconds.

  Tripp kept the Alpha’s outer hatch open, “Bonnie, go.”

  She took a run toward the lip of airlock and jumped into the vacuum.

  Whoosh.

  Bonnie held her arms to her sides and darted through space like an arrow.

  Beta’s airlock, containing the frightened Jelly, whizzed closer and closer. Bonnie held out her arms and kicked herself in. She grabbed hold of a lock on the floor, "I’m in, go! Go!"

  "Haloo," Tripp said through his visor, "You’re next."

  "I can’t see," she growled, fighting off the vacuum pressure. She pinched the bottom of her visor and threatened to open it.

  "What are you doing?" Tripp said, "Don’t open your visor—"

  It flipped up over her face, exposing her to the vacuum. Tripp couldn’t believe what he saw.

  Pink blood drenched Haloo’s face. Her eyeballs protruded from her skull.

  "I’m blind," she said, softly, as if overcome with wonder, "But I can see everything."

  "What are you talking about?" Katz gripped the bar on the wall. His feet kicked to the side, "Jump. Get back to Beta."

  Having seen Bonnie carry out the same action moments ago, Haloo ran toward the outer door and launched herself forward.

  Her body twisted through three-hundred-and-sixty degrees through space like a corkscrew.

  Tripp, Jaycee, and Katz heard her wail a cry of death as beads of pink blood raced out from her visor. They glinted against the reflection from Saturn.

  She made it into Beta’s airlock, very worse for wear. Bonnie clung to the handlebar in the airlock and watched Haloo coughing up blood, "Haloo? What are you doing?"

  "Caaa-aaan’t b-breathe…"

  "Meaaoww," Jelly yelped from the airlock hatch, scratching at the glass panel, "Maaaahh…"

  "Keep the air out of your lungs, Haloo," Bonnie screamed, "Don’t breathe."

  Katz turned to Tripp and Jaycee, "You two go—"

  A loud rumbling followed the debris funneling out of the ship. A huge ball of fire rumbled toward them.

  Zillah’s apparition floated in front of the ball of fire, ten seconds away from impact.

  "Pink symphony," Zillah’s mouthed opened nearly as wide as her arms, "Come to me."

  "Go," Katz shouted and turned to Tripp and Jaycee, "Go, now. I’ll keep the door open."

  "But, Captain," Tripp said as Katz barged him out of the way and grabbed the handle on the door.

  "Don’t disobey me. Both of you go, now."

  Tripp nodded and stepped out of the airlock, He twisted on his axis in space. Jaycee ran forward and jumped, grabbing Tripp around his waist.

  "Hold tight."

  Jaycee kicked them away from the airlock door and stretched out his legs. He aimed the tip of his foot toward the Zillah as she approached Katz at the airlock door.

  "Let’s kill two birds with one shoe."

  BLAM-BLAM-BLAM!

  Jaycee fire the cannon on his foot at Zillah as she entered the airlock. The force of the bullets pushed Jaycee and Tripp over to Opera Beta’s airlock.

  The bullets flew through Zillah’s body and into the oncoming rush of fire barreling up the airlock.

  "Daryl," Tripp said.

  Katz released the door. It slid across and blocked his view of Tripp and Jaycee.

  "Look after my crew, Tripp," Katz’s final communication came through the headset.

  "Daryl, no!"

  The door slammed shut, sealing Katz in with Zillah and the impending explosion.

  Tripp and Jaycee tumbled into Beta’s airlock, along with Haloo, Bonnie and Jelly.

  Tripp palmed the button on the outer door. It slammed shut and sealed them off in the airlock.

  Everyone turned to the glass door.

  Space Opera Alpha vibrated. The airlock filled with fire, sending a magnificently aggressive wave through its structure.

  The outer panels broke off, forcing the exterior of the ship to inflate along the ripples.

  A brief period of silence, followed by a whooshing noise.

  And then… everything went white.

  Haloo, Bonnie, Jelly, Tripp, and Jaycee held their forearms over their face and closed their eyes.

  A brilliant white light grew from the center of Space Opera Alpha and flooded the interior Beta airlock.

  Everything fell utterly silent.

  Then, an almighty explosion woke God himself. The ship exploded in sections.

  First to go was the front of the cone.

  Followed by its centrifuge, the ring itself shattered out, propelling the back-end of the ship away. It detonated impressively, adding to the already-spectacular firewor
k show.

  The separate explosions briefly arranged themselves into the shape of Zillah’s face, although Tripp knew it could have been his mind playing tricks.

  The force was enough to throw Opera Beta off track. Saturn bleached into view. What little remained of the dormant carcass of Space Opera Alpha hung in the vacuum of space.

  All of this, and with no sound whatsoever. The explosion sucked back in on itself the moment it ejected.

  No air in space; a deafening silence.

  The only way the team knew the destruction of Space Opera Alpha was a reality was through the vibrations felt from the components of their craft they clung to.

  Haloo coughed up a mound of thick, pink blood.

  Jelly slid down the airlock wall, utterly petrified.

  "Is everyone okay?" Tripp asked, wiping his outer skin down.

  Everyone was essentially fine, if a little rattled.

  Jaycee was without his firearm. He’d lost in transit. The K-SPARK gun spun around somewhere between what remained of Alpha and the steady Beta.

  "Lost my gun, but we’re good."

  "Bonnie?" Tripp asked, approaching her and holding the side of her visor. "Are you okay?"

  "Yes, yes," she looked into his eyes. "I’m okay."

  Haloo climbed to her knees and pressed her gloved palms to the floor. She spat a few lumps of bloodied phlegm to the floor and turned to Tripp.

  Her face had turned pink and her eyes continued to bleed.

  "Tripp?"

  "Haloo, are you okay?" He darted over to her and tried to lift her to her feet. She didn’t have the energy to do it.

  "I c-can’t move," Haloo wiped her eyes, "I don’t know what’s happened to me."

  Jelly sauntered over to Haloo and investigated her legs, "Meaaaooowww…"

  Her cries seemed a bit deeper.

  Tripp addressed Jaycee and Bonnie as he opened the inner airlock door, "We need to find Tor and take him out."

  "Tripp?" Jaycee reached into his belt and took out a Rez-9 firearm, "Wool is on board with him."

  "And Baldron is in N-Carcerate," Bonnie waited for Tripp to open the door, "We need to know where he is."

  "Yes." Tripp opened his visor and grabbed at his mouthpiece, "Manuel, this is Tripp. Can you read me?"

  "Good after-afternoon, Tripp," Manuel’s scrambled voice was full of static and sounded dislodged, "Did you r-r-r-rescue Aaaa-lphaa-aaaa—"

  "Eh?" Tripp tried again, "Manuel? Do you read me?"

  No response.

  "Tor’s interfering with him," Tripp said. "Jaycee, escort Haloo and Jelly to Medix. Find Wool, and have her run a health check on both of them."

  "Yes, Captain."

  Tripp nodded. "That’s right. Have her run a check on you, too."

  "Understood."

  "Bonnie and I will find Tor and deal with him ourselves."

  "You’d better take this, then," Jaycee unclipped a second Rez-9 firearm from his belt and handed it to Tripp.

  Bonnie watched Tripp take it and slip it into his belt, "Be careful with that, Healy."

  "I’m hoping I won’t have to use it."

  Bonnie punched the inner airlock panel and opened the hatch, "If I find him first, you won’t have to."

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  Jaycee helped Haloo across the hub. Jelly followed behind, meowing and whining.

  Haloo’s legs threatened to buckle as she walked. The only thing keeping her moving was Jaycee’s grip on her shoulder.

  "You’ll be okay, Haloo," Jaycee said as they made their way to the Medix center, "We’ll get you seen to."

  "Maaaah!" Jelly hopped in front of them and up the corridor. She ran her head along the side of the door to Medix.

  "What is it, Anderson?" Jaycee said.

  She scratched her metal claws up the window and rammed her head onto its surface.

  "Yes, I know, I know," Jaycee clunked his way along the ground, "We’ll find Wool and make sure everyone is okay."

  Jaycee opened the door and walked into Medix with Haloo draped over his shoulder.

  Nobody was around.

  "Wool, we’re here," Jayce said. "Where are you?"

  He removed Haloo’s helmet and laid her out on a bed. He puffed up one of the pillows and laid the back of her head on it.

  "Wait here, Haloo," he turned to Jelly. She looked up at him and meowed.

  "What do you want, girl?" Jaycee saw that Jelly’s eyes were bleeding. Her bright orange fur had turned to a soft pink, "What’s happening to your face?"

  "Meeeeeee-ooooooowwww… w-ooooooll…"

  "Anderson? You’re concerning me."

  "Meow," Jelly repeated again, her voice turning huskier, "Meeeoooowwwooo-ooolll…"

  "Wool?"

  Jelly purred and ducked her head. Her metal claws began to flap uncontrollably like a jazzed-up pair of gloves, "Rowaarr."

  Jelly flipped onto her behind and tried to fight her her paws - with her own paws.

  "Hey, stop that," Jaycee walked around her, "What are you doing?"

  Jelly tumbled onto her side and kicked her hind legs out, trying to fight off whatever was happening to her.

  "Jaaaaaay-ceeeee…" her voice broke into a low-pitched growl. Sparks of electricity burst out from her paws.

  Jaycee looked to find a tiny bead of pink liquid fall splash against his left shoe.

  It broke apart as it collided with the ground, bleaching across the white tiles, "What’s happening to us?"

  "H-Help m-me…" Haloo’s voice and body vibrated aggressively.

  Jaycee wiped the bloodied patch from his cheek and raced over to Haloo. Her face had turned pink and her eyes were bleeding once again.

  "What’s going on here?" Jayce caught a glimpse of his own reflection in the mirrored wall. His face had gone pink, too.

  His eyes cried pink blood.

  ***

  Tripp and Bonnie headed for Opera Beta’s control deck. He cleared his throat and felt his stomach.

  "I don’t feel too great," he said, making a beeline for the control deck door.

  "We’ve just swam through a vacuum and watched our sister ship detonate," Bonnie muttered, "I think we’re entitled to feel a bit exhausted."

  "I guess you’re right. We have what we need. As soon as we find Tor, we’re turning around and heading straight for home," Tripp snapped his fingers, expecting Manuel to appear, "Manuel?"

  Snap-snap-snap. Nothing.

  "Manuel?"

  "What happened to Androgyne?" Bonnie wondered aloud.

  "I don’t know. We need answers."

  Tripp held his glove to the panel on the door to the control deck. It opened, and they walked in.

  "Ah, you made it," Tor grinned and leaned against on the flight deck. Tripp and Bonnie clocked his Russian accent immediately, "I have to say, that was quite an impressive feat. Jumping from one ship to another."

  "Tor Klyce," Tripp stopped a few feet away from him, "Under USARIC code fourteen-oh-three and Infinity Clause three, subsection twelve, I hereby place you under arrest for the murder of Captain Daryl J. Katz. Further, IC Two-oh-Five, disobeying a direct command from your superior officer and jeopardizing the souls aboard both Opera Alpha and Opera Beta."

  Tor sniggered with menace, "Is that so, Captain?"

  "It is so, Tor," Tripp retrieved a Rez-9 firearm from his belt, hoping he wouldn’t have to use it, "You will be put into hyper-sleep under N-Carcerate jurisdiction until we reach Earth, where you will be formally charged. Do you understand this statement as I have recited it to you?"

  "Yes, I understand what you’re saying," Tor chuckled. "But you don’t seem to understand the bigger picture."

  Bonnie became infuriated with Tor’s response, "What bigger picture?"

  "You stupid Yanks. You’re all the same. Never want to play with the others. Always wanting to take all the credit," Tor nodded behind them, “You poison Viktor Rabinovich, our most esteemed diplomat on your soil and expect to get away with it?”

 
; They turned around to find Baldron pointing a K-SPARK machine gun at them, "Drop the weaponry, American."

  Tripp and Bonnie held up their hands.

  "Hand over your firearm," Baldron said.

  Tripp tossed the Rez-9 at Tor’s feet. The bad guy bent down and picked it up. He aimed the barrel at Tripp and Bonnie.

  "It is quite simple, really," Tor explained. "You deciphered Saturn Cry for us. You and your crew dock with Alpha and perish in the explosion. Such a shame that Baldron and I were the only ones left with that stupid cat. A Pyhrric but believable victory for us considering your nation attacked ours."

  "We will take the glory," Baldron said, "We were the only survivors of Space Opera Beta’s mission to Enceladus. We figured out what Saturn Cry means."

  “The United States didn’t attack Rabinovich.”

  “Yes, they did,’ Baldron winked at Tor. The pair found it difficult to quell their laughter, “Anyway, who cares? We are heroes.”

  "Like hell you are." Bonnie resisted the urge to punch them both in the face and risk getting herself killed, "You’re nothing but scum."

  Tor folded his arms with confidence, "On the contrary, young American girl. Show me your forearm."

  "What?"

  "Do it, or I will shoot you in the face."

  Bonnie did as she was told. She lifted her forearm up and looked at it. “Have you gone mad?”

  "If you look on your forearm, you’ll find a panel."

  All she could see was the black ink of her Individimedia, "What panel?"

  Tor ran his finger along Bonnie’s black tattoo line. It fizzed and shifted apart, creating a Rorschach-esque rectangle.

  "Bonnie Whitaker," Tor said. "You’re equipped with a self-destruct button. Inside where your womb would be, if you were human, is a quarter tonne of C4. If you hold down the two buttons for five seconds, it would enable a two-minute self-destruct scenario."

  "No, no…" She pushed the man back as a wave of terror thundered down her spine, "No, no, it isn’t true."

  "Bonnie?" Tripp turned to her and kept his arms above his head.

  "Don’t move, American," Baldron threatened Tripp and turned to Bonnie, "And you, don’t move, either. You useless piece of metallic junk."

  "No, no," Bonnie punched her fists together, trying to escape the inevitable explanation, "It can’t be true."

 

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