Author: Aly Martinez
Category: Contemporary
Go to read content：https://onlinereadfreenovel.com/aly-martinez/page,17,605557-the_difference_between_somebody_and_someone_the_difference_trilogy_book_1.html
“All of it,” I answered.
Unmerciful.
Unrelenting.
Unencumbered.
Unyielding.
Every strike found my core. Every thrust, I met him for another.
After he masterfully found my clit, lit a fuse, and waited for me to go off on his cock and his hand, he growled, “All fucking mine,” through what sounded like clenched teeth as he came.
We sat there for several moments, his fingertips biting into my hips, the sound of our labored breathing filling the truck. Reaching around, he palmed my breasts and eased my upper body back to rest against his chest. The scruff on his jaw tickled my shoulder.
“If I tell you I love you now, I risk it coming off as a product of desperation. If I don’t, I’m a lying fool.”
I smiled, my stomach dipping in the best possible way. Putting my chin to my shoulder, I peered back at him. “Then I won’t tell you I love you too and we’ll be even.”
He blew out a ragged breath and kissed my shoulder.
Hitting the light above the rearview mirror, I blinded us both. When I was finally able to see again, I glanced around the truck, my clothes strewn everywhere. “You know I haven’t had car sex since—”
“Ever,” he finished. “My cock is still inside you, babe. The answer is you haven’t had car sex ever.”
I giggled. “Well, obviously, that’s what I was going to say.”
“Perfect,” he rumbled, giving me a tight hug.
“Hey, Bowen?”
“Right here.”
“You know we’re going to have to talk about earlier, right?”
He drew in a deep breath and then held it for several seconds. “Yeah, I know. Let’s get you inside and cleaned up first.”
Remi
“Remi,” Bowen called from his bedroom, his bare feet padding toward me. “What are you doing? I thought you were getting some water.”
I lifted the full glass in his direction but continued to stare down at the crack at the bottom of his guest room door, two little black paws sticking out.
We still hadn’t had our talk. When we’d come in from the garage, he’d joined me in the shower, his hands washing every inch of my body, including my hair. It wasn’t sexual, but it was intimate all the same.
I returned the favor, lathering his chest with soap while peppering kisses across his collarbone. Every so often, my name would flow from his lips on a pained whisper, but he never followed it up with anything more, so each time, I simply replied with a reassuring, “I’m right here.”
We once again skipped his elusive burgers, opting for a pizza I’d found in his freezer. Side by side on the stools at his bar, we split a bottle of wine, and even as we ate and drank our dinner, his hand never left my thigh. The wine lightened the mood a fraction. He’d managed a smile when I’d pinched his ass, and a few minutes after I’d pulled on one of his T-shirts to sleep in, he’d waggled his eyebrows, following it up with an ass grab of his own.
As I stood in the hall staring down at his pup’s feet under the door, he walked up behind me, pressing his front to my back, and slid his arms around my waist. “He’s not stuck. He’s at the door because he can hear you out here.”
“He is kinda stuck though. They sleep in your room when I’m not here, right?” I couldn’t see his face, but he kissed the top of my head.
“They’re fine, babe. I took them outside while you were brushing your teeth. Gave them both treats. Even fluffed their dog beds. Not that Sugar will use his, but I put extra pillows on the guest bed for his majesty.”
The little feet shuffled from under the door, and guilt slashed through me. “First, I stole their dad, then their bed. My future step-dogs are going to hate me.”
Bowen’s chest shook with a chuckle. “Those two aren’t capable of hating anyone. One piece of lunch meat and all grievances are forgiven.”
Like he was suddenly fluent in English, Sugar let out the cutest bark, going crazy as if he could dig his way out.
Bowen had been great about keeping them put away while I was at his house, but if I was to be a permanent fixture in his life the way I so hoped, I would have to get used to them sooner rather than later. “Do you think I could meet the little one? Maybe ease into things?”
Bowen slid around in front of me. A grin twitched his lips. “Now?”
“Yeah. Why not? Poor guy obviously isn’t ready for bed yet.”
His mouth stretched into a full-blown smile. “You sure? He’s a wild child. But he won’t hurt you. He’ll jump on you. Tap-dance. Cover you with kisses, maybe even sneak a few on your lips if you aren’t careful, but I swear to you he’s the sweetest dog you’ll ever meet.”
“I believe you, but can we maybe do the lunch meat thing too? Just in case he’s holding a grudge about the recent sleeping arrangements.”
He laughed, but the happiness sparkling in his eyes made me feel even worse for not doing it earlier.
“Be right back.” In less than a minute, he returned from the kitchen with two slices of ham.
Of course he’d brought two.
Bowen was a good dog daddy. He wouldn’t dare deny Clyde a snack if Sugar was getting one.
He handed me the meat wrapped in a paper towel. Nerves almost two decades old churned in my stomach as he cracked the door. I waited for Clyde to plow over his owner, trampling Sugar in his herculean wake. But Bowen simply scooped Sugar up with one swift movement, tucking him under his arm, and then calmly ordered, “Stay.”
Chancing a peek into the room, I saw the mammoth dog sitting in the middle of a huge, round dog bed, the tip of his tail thumping the wood floor. Terrifying as my brain thought the brown beast might have been, he was also pretty damn cute with his droopy jowls and floppy ears. Bowen tore off a piece of the meat before walking over and offering it to him. I waited for my man to pull back a bloody stump, but Clyde was a gentleman, sniffing it before delicately taking the ham between his teeth.
“He was hoping for cheese,” Bowen said, ruffling his ears.
“Right, so I’ll bring a block of cheddar when I’m ready to meet him.”
He laughed and headed back my way. Luckily, Clyde made no move to bolt out the door and maul me. With all of my limbs still intact, I’d already chalked the doggy meet and greet up as a huge success and I hadn’t even officially met Sugar yet.
“Easy, boy,” Bowen mumbled. His fingers tangled with mine as he led me to the bedroom.
Sugar wiggled in his grip, locking eyes with me over his shoulder. It was probably because he smelled the ham, but I pretended he was just excited to meet me—and not at all kill me in my sleep.
“All right,” Bowen said as I got comfortable on the bed. “Here’s how this is going to work. Tear off a little piece of the ham and I’ll set him down. Fair warning, he’s going to do exactly two zoomies around the bed before stopping for the treat. Then he will immediately do another two.”
I crinkled my nose. “Zoomies?”
“Race around in laps. It’s his nightly ritual. Don’t fight it. When he’s done, he’ll want the rest of the ham. If you aren’t quick enough, he’ll bark. But that’s all. I swear to you he’s a lover, not a fighter, and I’ll be right here with you the whole time.”
The dog couldn’t have weighed more than five to ten pounds. I felt relatively confident I could handle my own if he turned rabid. But it was sweet how patient and reassuring Bowen was with me. Come on. I was a twenty-nine-year-old woman scared of a poodle. It wasn’t my most attractive trait.
“You ready?” he asked.
I tore a corner of the ham and blew out an even exhale. “As I’ll ever be.”
He set the dog on the bed, and I waited for the so-called zoomies. Instead, Sugar pranced over to me, bypassing the ham I was all but trying to shove down his throat, and climbed up my chest, licking my face any and everywhere he could reach.
Bowen had been right. He definitely caught me on the lips a few times.
“Are you
good?” Bowen asked, studying me intently.
“Yep.” I giggled, pushing the dog out of my face. He collapsed into a ball on my lap, rolling in every which direction, his nubby tail wagging a mile a minute.
Bowen sank beside me on the bed and gave the dog’s belly a rub. “See? I told you he wouldn’t hate you.”
I laughed as Sugar jumped right back up, catching me with a kiss on the chin, before taking off in a dead sprint around the bed. He came to a sliding stop in front of me, letting out a loud yip that made me jump, but after a quick nibble of ham, he was back off to the races.
“Is he always this hyper?” I asked as Bowen leaned back against the headboard, kicking his legs out. Sugar did not hesitate to launch himself over them mid-dash.
“He’s actually calmed down since we got him.”
It was strange. I knew Bowen had a whole traumatic history involving his lost fiancée. It had never even occurred to me to be bothered or jealous by a woman who had lost her life. But there was something about the way he’d said we that hit me squarely in the chest.
I tried my best not to let him see it, but I must not have been quick enough to hide the flinch. He took the paper towel from my hand, gave the last treat to Sugar, and then put his arm down around my shoulders, dragging me against his side, resting my head on his bare chest.
“Ah, shit, I fucked that up,” he groaned.
“No, you didn’t,” I lied.
Sugar trotted over to us, staring for a minute before climbing up Bowen’s body like a billy goat. He circled three times, looking for the most comfortable place on his human, then flopped down into the curve where my stomach met his dad’s side, half on, half off both of us. I gently stroked his back while listening to the slow and steady rhythm of Bowen’s heart.
“You can ask, ya know?” he finally said.
I tipped my head back to look at him. “I don’t want to ask. I want it to be something you share. Something you trust me with. A relationship is give and take, Bowen. This isn’t something I get to take from you with questions.”
“Jesus,” he breathed, threading his fingers through the top of my hair.
“You don’t have to tell me at all. But I can’t read minds, and I can’t stop things from hurting you if I don’t know what they are. I messed up tonight. I’m more than willing to admit it. But you scared me too. Something awful happened inside you, and it’s killing me to think I could unknowingly cause that again.”
“It’s not your fault,” he said adamantly. “Please, God, never say that any of this shit is your fault. It’s just…” His Adam’s apple bobbed, and he shook his head. “When I met Sally, it was a whirlwind. Time wasn’t a factor. In the span of three weeks, I’d fallen in love and planned a future.” His gaze collided with mine. “When I know, I know, Remi. It’s how I feel when I’m with you.”
I melted into his side. Funny enough, I understood completely. From the moment I’d laid eyes on him at the courthouse, I’d had no doubt he was someone special. I didn’t know how or why or when. But I always felt the unexplainable connection when we were together.
“I feel it with you too.”
“Good.” He kissed my forehead before continuing. “A week shy of our one-month anniversary, I got drunk and ballsy and asked her to move in with me. She’d thought of every reason in the book why it was too fast, but she never said no. The next morning, she disappeared.”
My body jerked as puzzle pieces from that afternoon started snapping into place. Shit. It hadn’t been about the plane crash at all.
He paused only long enough to draw me tighter against his side. I got the feeling it was an attempt to ground us both, and dread pooled in my stomach.
“I called the few friends of hers I knew at that point. They hadn’t seen her, so they turned around and called her family. No one knew where she’d gone though. Her car, her purse, her cell phone, and several suitcases of clothing were missing. The cops were notified but told us there was nothing they could do about a woman going on vacation. And by all accounts, that was honestly how it looked. But my instincts wouldn’t shake the feeling that something had happened to her. I felt it in my bones. The worst part was, once I explained that I’d asked her to move in with me, everyone, even her family, started to believe the cops too. They thought I’d spooked her. Too much. Too soon.” He let out a low growl. “Not my Sally though.”
I’d said I wouldn’t ask questions. I’d sworn to myself I was just going to let his thoughts flow and accept whatever parts of himself he wanted to reveal. But my heart was in my throat, suddenly frozen in fear of where the story was headed. “Wh-what happened to her?”
“That’s the one question that ruined us all. Five days later, they found her in her car at the park where she’d said she was going for a run. I’d searched every inch of that trail at least a dozen times before that and there was no sign of her or her car, but somehow, she miraculously just showed up one day, drugged out of her mind.”
A chill pebbled my skin. “What?”
“She wasn’t into drugs. Her friends said they’d dabbled with stuff in college, but when they found her unconscious, there were needles and heroin beside her, track marks on her arms. Everyone was so quick to assume she’d gone off on some kind of bender. The police, the doctors… Hell, even her best friend bought into it for a while. Everything was a haze for her, but she was adamant that a man had kidnapped her and given her the drugs against her will.”
“Holy shit,” I breathed. It wasn’t the most eloquent or supportive response, but what the hell else was there to say?
“Yeah,” he muttered. “It was awful. She was hysterical, but she had so few memories of what had happened to her over those five days that we couldn’t make the cops do anything. They dusted her car for prints, but that was about it. They told us just to be happy they didn’t arrest her,” he scoffed, but even that sounded pained. “I was so fucking relieved when they found her. She was alive, and that was all I needed. But little did I know it was only the start of the hardest chapter of my entire life.”
My eyes closed, a sick unease swelling in my stomach. What in the world could have possibly made it worse?
“She wasn’t the same woman when she came home, Remi. And who could blame her? She’d survived hell. But where she’d once been so fiercely independent, she became terrified of everything. And when she wasn’t scared, she was obsessing about another woman who she swore had been kidnapped too and held in the same cold, dark room with her. She didn’t know anything about her or what she looked like, but her cries haunted Sally’s dreams. She spent entire days camped out at the police station, begging them to find her. But once again, without anything to go on, the police wrote her off. And they weren’t the only ones. She and her best friend had a falling out over her inability to let it go and focus on her own recovery. Her dad tried to convince her to start therapy, but he made the mistake of sending her to a facility that included an inpatient drug program, which promptly sent her over the edge.”
Unshed emotion sparkled in his eyes. “And there I was, stuck in the middle, desperately holding on to mere pieces of a woman I would have given anything to put back together, without the first clue how to help her.”
“Oh, God, Bowen.” I curled my hand around the side of his neck.
Sugar was having none of Bowen getting all the attention, so he army-crawled up, hitting me with a drive-by kiss to the nose on his way, and curled up like a cat on his dad’s shoulder.
An almost genuine smile tipped the side of Bowen’s mouth. And in that moment, I was more grateful than ever for the needy dog.
He gave the pup’s head a scratch. “Not too long after that, I gave her Sugar, naïvely hoping he would be a distraction. Sally was timid with Clyde at first too, but they became fast friends, and I thought having her own dog that could go back and forth between her place and mine would be good.”
Leaning his head to the side, he gave Sugar a snuggle. “She was so damn happy those firs
t few weeks. Doting on him. Babying him. Buying him outfits. I honestly thought she was coming back to me. But it was all a ruse. She figured out the only thing I needed to be happy was for her to smile. And fuck me, she played the part like there was an Oscar up for grabs. None of it was real though. She was still scared. Broken. Shattered. Consumed by guilt and pain.” His gaze came back to me, his smile sinking into a sea of regret and shame. “She tried to kill herself three separate times.”
My whole body seized, and I bit my lower lip. Tears rolled down my cheeks. Who I was crying for, I couldn’t be certain. My heart ached for Bowen and everything he’d been through, but dear God, that poor woman.
“Hey,” Bowen whispered. “Please. Don’t cry.”
My shoulders shook with a sob. It was official. I was the world’s worst support system. I was supposed to be comforting him, yet my whole body trembled and my lungs burned for air that couldn’t quite make it past the boulder on my chest. “It’s a lot, Bowen. For both of you. I can’t even imagine…”
“And you’ll never have to.” In one swift movement, he plucked the dog from his shoulder, set him on the floor, and then rolled into me. His front became flush with mine, nose to nose, his minty breath whispering across my skin. “I would give up my entire life to make sure you never have to imagine a single second of that, Remi.” With soft, gentle kisses, he dried the tears from my cheeks, taking my pain as his own as if his wasn’t enough.
Gliding my fingers into the back of his hair, I murmured against his lips, “Did they ever find the man who took her?”
“No.”
“The other woman?”
He leaned away far enough to catch my eye. “No.”
A wave of grief crashed down over me, stealing my breath. Empathy had always been my strong suit, but this felt as though I’d been caught in the undertow. “Oh, God.”
His arms tightened around me. “Don’t do that. It broke her. Don’t put this on your conscience too.”